SBE: Expectation That Has Been Torn Apart

- SK ST Anthony Tenom [culture shock], Tenom. 7/3/2012 
I went to school earlier today. And to my foolishness, it was very awkward when you have to sit down quietly, watching other teachers doing their stuff. Plenty of things revolved in me; about how'd practicum look like. I am kind of a passive student, it's seriously hard to make any attachment with anyone, anything. And so I did what I do best; contemplating upon the misty hills. And right after my mentor came in and signed his attendance, I followed him to his desk. Asking about when I can enter his class during his PnP to do classroom observation. 
And after that, the PK Administration knocked the door where we were lazying around. Sir Alfred. He showed us a table in which showed class that we need to fill in.They call it class relief. I call it: total messed up. I was handling things clumsily.As soon as I entered the class, students were running here to there, beating each other. I laughed, and said to myself: "Sven,what have you gotten yourself into?" 
We practically did nothing but trying to control pupils' movement. I thought as much of being strict and stern, but I didn't. What'd you expect to be that serious, as you only have two days to experience first hand class's situation. I really wanted to yell, to scold those who had worms in their cha-cha-cha (who refused to sit whenever I asked them to).
Upon seeing their innocent faces, I saved my anger deep. Egoism shouldn't be fought with another egoism. It must be extinguished (read: controlled) with patience. So I just let them do things their way, but maintaining my autonomic power on the class. Kids... whenever they have control over things, they'll begin to disrespect you.
 Especially boys. Never, ever, ever let them overwhelm you. Make sure that on the first day, you show strict impression. Don't tell them straight away that you're strict. Show it through your attitude and reactions. But hen, this has been always, mere theory. I didn't do this in my (first class). I love seeing them moving actively, like there's some kind of infinite vitality in them. They barely got tired whilst I was barely able to breath.
I learn a lot from them, though (let me keep this for my private wisdom). And on one occasion, I whispered to one of the groups about how much I love them. They giggled, but they comprehended what I was trying to say. I said, "I love group that is silent and acting decent." And they suddenly turned that way. What a down-to-earth being, they are.
Tomorrow, I have got class with them. We are not allowed to teach, but we sure are going to take advantage upon this chance. Will try to gain as many experience as we can, and learn something from them. I once read a quote, "Education is more of studying that teaching". I guess it's true enough.

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